new art by Laurie Fraser

Been working with barnwood – so fun to let the wood grain lead the way:

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Acrylic. The wood was already broken.

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This fairy's pronoun is 'they'.

I think the knots make excellent suns.

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The sky became a river and the fairies went swimming. Fairy wings are red-wing blackbird feathers.

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First one I did – seemed like a storm to me.

These next pieces are on canvas. I press the flowers. The flying geese are bleeding hearts, Sun is tickweed… and you already know Queen Anne, Daisy, Columbine and Indian Paintbrush.

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small, maybe 3″x4″

Next pieces are large and took a long time – all done on the porch in the wind and sun, paint flying, insects stopping by for a look.

First we have Manic Garden. I wanted to paint mania. It’s like this: where to look? no real focus but many things to see: 2 fairies, flowers turn into flutterbys, pressed flowers on painted flowers… clarity in confusion. In mania we sometimes miss the big picture and get lost in details.

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16″ x 24″

This next piece is also large, took me a couple of months, again on the porch, this time with a broken rib. So I call this one “Broken Rib” but really it is “Fairies at Work”.

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Their wings are guinea hen feathers, blue jay feathers, some unknown feathers, maple keys and flower petals. Their paintbrushes are twigs. The fairies and buckets are cardboard and marker, made separately and glued on with bits of styrofoam. I explained to a friend: I can’t paint fairies, I have to use marker, I’m just faking everything. I don’t really know how to make art.” She told me this is legit – it’s called mixed media. Gales of laughter. 16″ x 24″

This next fairy is at play! 2″ x 3″ markers on paper.

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with wings 2

acrylic paint, pressed flowers and fairies are lifted and done with marker.

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I got into this lifting – I used to call it decoupage. The fairy is on bits of styrofoam. Her wings are mallow petals.

Thanks for looking at my art! This is new for me and I have so much fun, especially doing it outside. Check out this beauty… but just a craft from childhood, right? Posterboard, acrylic, wool. So fun.

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I sign them LoLo which is my nickname.

Posted in art

Messages from people who have died.

I am clarivoyant and I get messages from people who have died for the people they love who have been left behind here on Earth.

I’m a healer and so often these messages arrive spontaneously during a healing. For example, a client’s father showed up at her healing and said, “The house is yours. I’m happy about that.” (She’d been feeling guilty about getting the house over her siblings, even though she paid them for their share.)

These sorts of messages have been commonplace for me since 2008.

What’s new is that I’ve been asking specifically for messages for a certain reason. My mom crossed 2 years ago and I’ve been calling her in to ask for messages to write into a card for my dad’s birthday, Christmas and their anniversary. I put those messages in little cards and give them to him.

I remember the first few were about how often she is with him, her love and some reassurances that it is indeed her when he sees a cardinal. I remember one was about the devotion she felt toward him, making his lunch every day and remembering picnics at Hogs Back Falls. This anniversary, I took a picture of the card:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At the same time, a friend of mine has been very ill for the past 2 years. At some point, we realized that she would not recover. I called in her husband, who is deceased, for any messages:

and later, when she was in hospice, this one:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This one was for a man going through a crisis. His father died some years ago:

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I do long distance healings and can get messages during the healings. This happens every week. I worked on a baby who wanted her parents to know that she doesn’t like loud music. I worked on a man who had a dog show up at his healing. The dog wanted him to know that he loves running with him, that he is always with him when he goes out for a run, just like the old days. A deceased grandfather arrived with a huge bouquet of white roses for a young client.

I asked, “Are you getting married or graduating or something?”

“Yes,” she said, “My wedding is in a month.”

He says, “Congratulations,” I told her. “He’s brought you a gift of white roses.”

“Wow! It’s a white wedding, everything white!”

Common messages from visitors:

Don’t worry so much. Relax, enjoy.

There’s nothing to forgive.

I love you.

I’m with you most of the time.

If you would like a mesage from a person who has crossed over, I need only a photo to connect with them. I see images (the castle, the suns and rabbit…)  and I hear words, phrases and sentences. I can provide the message and, if you like, I can make the card and mail it.

My cat is preparing to die.

I think she’s preparing me too. At 17 ½ years, she has lived with me longer than anyone else, including my parents and siblings.

I do energetic healings on her regularly. When she was a kitten, her energy often requested healing on a past life. Five lifetimes ago, Cairo was a tabby belonging to a man who tortured her. I haven’t seen much of that life, but it involved a garage and pain and helplessness. She was afraid of my garage for the first few years, especially when I came out of the garage carrying a load of wood up the stairs. She’d growl and attack me. I realized that it was a trigger… so I learned to talk all the way up the stairs reassuring her that there was no danger. In previous lifetimes she also died twice in fires, trying to bite her way out. She’s a biter, and she’s afraid of the woodstove.

In a healing a few weeks ago, her energy asked for the contract between her and that cruel man from 5 lives ago be broken. A contract between 2 souls is an agreement to explore certain themes throughout many lifetimes.

For example, my husband and I explored the theme of power and powerlessness throughout many lifetimes. In one life, I was his mother and had unlimited power for some years. In another, he was my servant. In our current lifetime, he was encouraged by his environment to beat me, but he never did. (Read The Word Not Spoken to learn more of this marriage that took place in Turkey between a Kurdish Freedom Fighter and a Canadian backpacker.) We shared many lives with one having power over the other. In a way, we explore difficult themes or experiences with souls we trust. However, I’ve had enough of repeated, sometimes ancient, obligatory experiences.

I broke that energetic or spiritual contract because I’m done. And so I’m out. Contracts are obligatory agreements between 2 souls. It takes two. Free will is supreme. I’ve ended all contracts. When a new person comes into my life, I end the contract first thing. I will explore whatever I want and these days, it is peace, harmony, love and kindness.

It is a simple and freeing thing to do. The love remains, the emotion remains, just the obligatory experiences go. Cairo, my lovely cat, was frightened to die with the possibility looming that she may have to share a home with that soul again. I would normally write his name on a piece of paper, but I wrote: “Cairo’s owner 5 lifetimes ago who hurt her” and then I said: “On behalf of Cairo, at Cairo’s request, I hereby end any and all contracts between her and her owner from 5 lives ago. This includes all contracts, all versions, all types, and all copies, all versions, all types, through all dimensions and all time: She’s out.” Then I burn the paper. “So be it and so it is.”

And that’s done. What else, my Sweet, what else do you need to be ready?

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In another recent session, her energy asked me to call in all her exiled parts. Parts of ourselves leave: some are sent away, yes, but some just leave on their own. They can be called back. We can all be whole, and I choose to be whole when I die. For example, the wife part of me left when my second husband walked out the door. I remember saying: “I’ll never marry again”. Another example: many parts of me left when I was a child and learned that some behaviours would not be tolerated. I’ve had to call back Wild Me, Stubborn Me (yes, all of our parts, even those that society doesn’t approve of), Sexy Me.

So, I’ve done this with clients and friends. Hold out your arms, wide and welcoming, outside. Call your parts home, all parts, declare your love for your Self, your desire to have everyone home in your heart, no matter why they left. Stand there, arms open. Notice how your heart and body feel. Call them again. Slowly draw your arms in, your hands to your heart, gathering them and bringing them home. You might do this several times over a year, for example. Some parts are shy; some were hurt. Be trustworthy and sincere and loving. A little girl came back to me one day when I asked them all to come home. She’s still 5 years old. She was still sacred of her mom. I showed her around my house. “It’s safe here. She only comes here if I invite her. She lives a long way away. I’m adult and I’m in control and I love you very much.” I took her around the rooms. “What do you recognize? Anything? I know…. come and see…. Look, our doll, Trixie is still here. Remember her blue dress? Let’s put it on her. We missed you. Thank you for coming back.”

So, Cairo’s parts have been called home. I don’t know who all came back, but sometimes we work on “return of exiled parts” in an energy healing. (We usually work on “pain” or “arthritis.”)

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This past week, I asked what to work on and her energy asked for “preparation for death”. I agreed and immediately a strong loving presence appeared on my left side, between Cairo and I. I looked to check who it was, expecting a wild cat. Lion archetype and lynx have come in the past to support her. To my surprise, it was a human. A human who has crossed over. She communicated to me that Cairo will cross over into her arms. She’s often been her owner, always loving and she hangs out with us these days, supporting Cairo and waiting for the crossing.

That reassured me. I love that Cairo will be received by that big pile of love. (I’ve also been shown my dad, finishing a marathon, pulling up near to the finish line where a crowd waits for him, cheering, waiting, loving. He’ll be fine.)

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Cairo’s energy answered some questions for me. She will die peacefully, maybe in her sleep. She’s content with the burial place I’ve chosen and has no preference for it to be ashes or a body that I place there.

I’m a healer and many clients asked over the years, “Oh is your cat a healer too? How does she help you?”

I laugh, “Oh no, she’s here to be healed and heard.” She’s a young soul (only 43 lives) with lots to learn. She’s been aggressive – disabled my right hand for one – and the love of my life. No one else has tolerated me for so long, and I have tolerated no one else for this long.

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One time, she said to me: “Thanks for playing with me.” We had elaborate games involving hiding and playing catch and jumping sky high when she was younger. Another time she said, “Stop moving my toys.”

Her energy often thanks me for the healing received in this life. I answer, “Thank you for loving me every day. Every single day for almost 18 years. It has been healing for me too, my Boo-be-do.”

P.S. You can also end your contracts with ‘poverty’, ‘abandonment’, ‘illness’ etc. when you suspect that a particular theme is repeating in your life.

Lolo’s yam and bean soup – GF, vegan option

I used to call it Thai soup, but yam & peanut butter is an African taste that I love. This recipe has developed over the years.

Ingredients in bold

A can of beans – black beans or chickpeas or other (small or big can, doesn’t matter)

Rinse beans and put in soup pot with enough water to well-cover the beans (about 2 cups) and some salt and put on to boil.

Find a cup of broth (homemade or a cup of hot water with bouillon cube) and add to pot.

Peel and cut in very large chunks – a big yam or 2 medium ones. Add to pot.

Boil all this until beans are soft and yam is still in chunks. If you overboil the yams or cut them too small, they will disintegrate into the soup and it will become orange. Man, that will happen by the second or third day anyway, and it’s yummy that way too.

While the beans and yam are boiling away, prep the rest of the veg you want to add. They will take less time to cook. Pop them in when they’re cleaned and trimmed and the timing will be right. (You could add green or yellow beans, carrot, celery, cauliflower, cooked chicken, cooked rice… or nothing. You don’t need much. Today I only added a handful of green beans. If you want to add spinach or other delicate veg, wait until the very end.)

Add a can of coconut milk when veggies are almost done. Turn it down to simmer.

Then add a few big pieces of red pepper (or green, but red is better).

Thai flavours are a balance of sweet (yam, coconut milk), spicey (ginger, chili), salty (fish sauce, tamari) and sour (lime, rice vinegar).

Taste as you season, then balance again at the end to suit your tastebuds.

Add the seasonings:

1 Tablespoon of peanut butter

Chili to taste (Use what you know: hot sauce, fresh chili, chili powder, cayenne powder, red or green curry paste. I like to use ground fresh chili paste from a bottle. Today I added ½ teaspoon.)

2 Tablespoons fish sauce (vegans replace with tamari sauce)

1 tablespoon or more ginger - grate fresh

1 teaspoon tamari sauce (or soy but soy is stronger, so cut the amount in half or to taste)

4 teaspoons rice vinegar (can be replaced with lemon or lime juice)

Simmer a while and taste again.

Garnishes, optional but they make a big difference, add what you have on hand:

Chopped peanuts

Lime – squeeze a quarter or half a lime into the soup bowl

Cilantro / coriander leaf chopped

Pumpkin seeds are nice too

Wild & Blue- A Story from Bangan Forest

art by William Fraser art by WJ Fraser

Blue Sky was skinny and sharp and blue. That about covers it. He was no more than 2 inches tall, thin as a pin, sharp nose, pointy hat, blue skin. His skin was losing colour. I mean, he was born bright blue, but a week later he was more the colour of faded jeans. He’ll die young – all fairies do – and he’ll be translucent by then.

Blue awakened early in anticipation of Corn Moon Celebration. She would be full tonight. Blue climbed out of his bluebell blossom bed and slid down her stalk. Grass was taller than Blue. He pushed blades and stalks aside and made his way to Echinacea who had some drops of Morning Dew on her petals. He washed his hands and face in Dewdrop. Since it was a special day, he pulled off his pointy blue boots and washed his pointy blue feet too. It tinged Dewdrop blue, but Dewdrops are used to these fairy effects. I mean, sometimes, if you take the time to notice, dewdrops resting on Sweetgrass and flower petals in Early Morning are many different colours: pink, green, gold, violet… depending on who’s been washing in them.

Deep Summer had a way of making everyone believe that she would never leave. She settled into Bangan Forest like Fat Human in a double-wide chair: heavy heat spread into every nook and cranny. It seemed it would be too much of an effort for her to ever pull herself out. Temperature was already torrid as Blue picked his clothes for Corn Moon’s celebration. Humming happily, he picked 3 clover leaves and wrapped them around his body. His belt was Blade of grass who wound round his waist 9 times- that’s how skinny Blue was. He topped his outfit off with his blue felt hat. He’d worn that hat every day since he found it hanging on Tiny Twig, forgotten by a long-ago fairy. It was a bit sticky, but that’s because it had been used to filter maple syrup in Spring.

Blue liked to sing, and he sang as he gathered food for breakfast: fiber from Dandelion’s bitter leaf sweetened with honey drips from Bee’s hive and milk from Milkweed. After he ate, he sat on Earth and wrapped gifts to share at the celebration. He put several honey drips in the middle of Buttercup’s blossom and then folded her petals over one by one to protect the tacky treasure. He was building a pile of these sticky yellow gifts, absorbed in his task, when:

“BOO BLUE!”

He startled even though he knew who it was immediately. “Wild! Don’t scare me like that!”

She giggled. “What are you doing?”

Blue showed her the sharing gifts. Wild had brought a little package of Primrose Pollen for the party, but she sat down beside Blue and helped him wrap Honey Drips. Soon they both had honey up to their elbows. By then Morning Dew had evaporated, so they gathered the sharing gifts up in a sack and headed to Cricket Creek to wash up. The sack was heavy, but no dragonflies were around to help, so Blue and Wild held the sack between them as they doggedly flitted up and down, at the mercy of Breeze, all the way to Cricket Creek.

Wild checked her reflection in Water. She had fresh Daisy Blossom on her head, the white petals reflecting Sun and keeping her cool. Her enormous eyes were amethyst. Wild had picked a white party dress- 2 fresh rose petals. As always, lavender filled her shoes and pockets; lavender flowers tangled her long hair. They were even in her ears. Sometimes she woke up with lavender petals in her mouth! All of that was because she slept in Lavender Bush. Her full name was Wild Lavender, and Blue Sky adored her. She looked good and she smelled good, but most important of all, she was his best friend.

Once they were all cleaned up, they flitted over to Sunny Stone. Sunny Stone was wide, low and flat. Sun loved him and they were always hanging out together, making themselves quite popular with snakes and dragonflies and fairies. This morning, Sunny Stone was covered in fairies who wanted a ride to Little Clearing. Red Dragonfly Service was working non-stop, but there must have been 20 fairies waiting. Blue took Wild’s tiny hand in his, and they flew down Elk’s Path a short way to get away from the crowd. A few minutes later, he flagged down LoLo Butterfly, and they were on their way.

Now, fairies will celebrate anything. Their lives are short and jam-packed with joy. Every single moment is worth celebrating in a fairy’s life. They celebrate new moons and full moons. They celebrate every new plant, every death; they celebrate the first fruit and the last fruit.

If you see a wild strawberry plant and there is a ring trodden around it, a ring where the grass is lighter and thinner, you can be sure that fairies danced there. You can be sure that this plant birthed the first strawberry of Summer. Fairies never eat that first white berry, even once it turns red. Well, no one in Bangan Forest would do that, for all have agreed to abide by the Honourable Harvest rules, one of which is: Do not take the first one nor the last one.

This day Corn Moon would be full and Little Clearing was full of fairies: fairies in summer dresses, fairies in supple leaves, fairies in flower blossoms, fairies with no clothes at all, fairies with acorn lid hats, top hats, garden hats, party hats…

Wild and Blue took their sharing gifts over to Violet Clump. Many sharing gifts had already arrived: pine needle baskets and pouches too, dried salty plants from Old Swamp, soapberries from the other side of Bangan Mountain, Dandelion straws filled with honey and milk, Lavender from Outer Meadow, a wide selection of feathers, some White Birch syrup, a few of Flint’s flakes.

“How blessed we are in Bangan Forest!” said Wild.

“Plenty,” smiled Blue. He wanted to kiss her. He kicked the toe of his pointy blue boot into Earth. “Plenty blessed.”

“With food and friends,” Wild said. She wanted to kiss him, but she just took his hand.

The friends flew over Goldenrod and Asters. Little Clearing was busy, but it would be downright crowded with fairies by Nightfall. Some friends lived here, like Morel Mushrooms and Pond, Rockin’ Rocks and Lilypad Knot. Others had travelled a long way for the festivity. Wood fairies, River Fairies and Mountain Fairies were all here, gathering to gather together.

Fairies celebrate the moment because they live in the moment. Although there was plenty of chatting, there was little actual news. Fairies don’t care about the past and they have no faith in the future, so for them, it’s just now. This Day’s news was that Corn Moon was full. No gossip. No fake news. No fearful imaginings. The only news a fairy needs is what to celebrate today.

A hummingbird named Senorita contributed to the buffet. Oh my, she was a remarkable cook. With Miniature Red Rose stuck behind one ear, Senorita had spent days cooking for Corn Moon. All the while humming and throwing flowers in the air, she had prepared corn muffins, corn panna cotta, corn chips, popped corn, charred kernels, and traditional corn soup. No matter how much fairies ate, Senorita Hummingbird would dart in with more delicacies: candied crab apples on branches, pine nut brittle, candy floss clouds. She was so fast that she could hang in midair, her wings flapping sixty times per second, both feet free to carry platters of food. To cut through the sweet treats, she served the tart tastes of Deep Summer: fresh blackberries and blueberries and ground cherries.

Blue filled 2 glasses with Nectar and brought one over to Wild who rested on Queen Anne’s Lace. He thought she was exquisite with her deep purple eyes and white rose petal dress, her long lilac braids and Queen’s throne. She reached out one delicate arm to take the drink.

“To this moment,” toasted Blue. It was Fairy’s Toast; it was always the same.

“To this moment,” grinned Wild. She thought he was spectacular with his blue skin and Clover clothes, his pointy nose and fancy boots.

Their glasses clinked as if they had kissed.

You would think Wild and Blue would kiss then. I mean, fairies don’t waste time. They cherish every moment. Like flutterbys and butterflies, fairies don’t live long. It’s their wings, their delicate wings. They are dripping fairy dust, dropping fairy dust everywhere they go. Enchanted dust that grants wishes, heals hearts and wields magic. So little precious dust, so little precious time.

For sure, you’d think Blue would kiss Wild or maybe, Wild would kiss Blue… in that moment, that toasted moment… but they did not. All afternoon, Wild and Blue chose to sit side by side on Queen Anne’s Lace, singing songs, holding hands and waiting for Corn Moon to show up. Who’s to say they didn’t savour every moment?

Deep Summer remained hot when Dusk arrived. Corn Moon showed up early; he was ecstatic to be full. He poured love down upon Mother Earth and all her life: plants, rocks, animals, humans, fairies. Moon loves all without judgement. If you exist, Moon loves you; it’s that simple.

Forest fairies and River fairies and Mountain fairies all danced in Moon’s light. Fairies love circles and Little Clearing was full of fairy circles: big circles, circles within circles, overlapping circles. Wild and Blue held hands as they danced, their wings beating faster than Hummingbird’s. Spirits were high; Magic was neigh. Fairies were drumming; fairies were strumming. Grasses swayed, flowers bobbed. Night Breeze was filled with petals and giggles and merriment.

Most feet were bare and not touching Earth at all. Fairies spun in pirouettes. Their precious dust sparkled. Fireflies joined the light show.

Each fairy was glowing their own colour, and as they circled together, they became halos of light. Pink halos, blue and green halos, golden rings rolling up into Starry Sky. Dancing fairies swirled like Saturn’s Ring. They whirled like Galaxy. And they were no less.

Wild and Blue were born of this place, Forest and Sky. Mother Earth’s love and Corn Moon’s love were one and the same to them. The love they had for each other was no less.

Corn Moon saw Wild Lavender and Blue Sky dancing in her light. She saw sweet shyness in their hearts, and she pulled them close to her. Wild and Blue rose through Starry Sky on Moon’s beam. And so it happened that Corn Moon kissed Wild, and then she kissed Blue, right on the lips.

Still holding hands, they slid down Moon’s beam, back to Mother Earth, back to Queen Anne’s Lace.

Oh yes, you can be sure…  it was then and it was there that Blue kissed Wild or maybe, Wild kissed Blue in Corn Moon’s light. It was a tiny little kiss, and it changed the world.

How can one tiny fairy kiss change the whole world? Every kiss does that. Every kiss changes the world.

©2020 Laurie Fraser

art by Laurie Fraser art by LoLo

 

The Sunflower Bloomed Yellow.

Morning prayer.

My fears soften and melt away.

I release _____ & ______ & ______. (eg: sadness, resentment, disease, dysfunction…)

I see the world with wonder.

I imagine only good things.

Hope rises within me.

Peace washes over me.

I hear the voice of wisdom.

It is safe to trust.

With confidence, I create my life.

My heart opens.

Joy flies.

Love flows.

All is well.

Crow calls: The time is now.

Crow calls: The time is now.

(I didn’t write this. I don’t remember the original source; it has been adapted over the years.)

Sandra Died

grey skies pour slush on
white roofs
iced branches fall on
white snow
grey tire tracks on
grey road
a green Perrier bottle half-full of frozen sap
the only colour.
My camera has broken so
I commit the scene to
my slurry memory.
I look out the window
a warm fire at my back
a cat squirmed under my arm
thunder under my feet
the window frame grey
the wet picture
underlined by green seedlings:
lupins, marigolds, zinnias
and a sunflower that is expected to bloom
pink.
Love Laurie, April 6, 2023
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We usually celebrated our birthdays together. Our 40 th was in Cuba. This pic is from 2012, our 50th.

pink sunflower

Remembering Rebecca

I found this today:

I wake up with cramps

and her with holidays.

She drives me to work.

She laughs.

Sunshine Beauty

become me your laughter.

Raise me home.

Drive me to work.

Laugh me life.

                                                            1984

What a sweet summer memory. My work was daycamp counselor and it took 2 buses to get there. But I was looking for this one:

Sitting, holding the railing

on the back stairs here,

in case I fall off.

I lost you.

Rebecca was under my heart.

Rebecca was on tire swings.

My house is quiet.

Sometimes I forget to pull a breath in.

How was it?

I lost you.

Even the cat here has died.

1991

Happy Birthday my sweet baby girl.